What’s Your Money Story
Money can elicit many emotions: fear, guilt, shame, security, love, envy, belonging, rejections, anxiety, stress, happiness, and anger, just to name a few. You can experience the aforementioned emotions at any point in life, but there seems to be a difference when it comes to money. The feelings are more intense and seem to linger after the fact. That is exactly why women are encouraged to go beyond learning basic money management. It’s necessary for them to explore their emotional relationship with money.
Many women assume they are uncomfortable with money based on the balances reflected in their bank accounts or the amount owed to the credit card companies. The numbers are just numbers. The seeds of discomfort were planted long before then. Most money stories start in childhood. You may have unintentionally inherited money management tips from one or both parents. Maybe you experienced poverty in your teenage or early adult years and it caused you to become extremely frugal. You could have been spoiled all of your life and now you can’t control your spending. There are so many ways that your relationship with money could have developed and only by doing deep introspective work will you be able to pinpoint what’s causing you trouble now.
Imagine that you are giving a passionate speech to an audience of your peers. You practiced for weeks and know everything about your topic. You’re in a packed auditorium and you’re on the stage killing it. The only problem is….YOU ARE NAKED! Not one stitch of clothing. That feeling right there is how exposed people can feel when their money secrets are laid bare.
Your personal relationship with money can bring up strong feelings of shame. Shame can come from secretly competing with others. Shame can be rooted in comparing your life to others. Comparison always has been and always will be the thief of joy.
In years past, society told women that they didn’t need to know anything about money. They were to be wholly dependent on me for their financial well-being. Be it saving, investing, paying bills, or budgeting, women were supposed to stay out of it. While in a relationship, you should have trust, but it is unhealthy to completely rely on another person for your financial wellness. You should at least know what is going on. Should illness or death befall that person, where would that leave you? NEWSFLASH: Meeting your basic needs doesn’t mean that person has your best interest at heart nor does it mean that you have a good relationship with money.
At the end of the day, it’s important to know that money can protect or propel you into both positive and negative situations. Money cannot protect you from abuse, accidents, addiction, or disease. In fact, money can sometimes make those issues worse.
It’s time to stop having fake conversations about money – where you can find the good deals, the rising price of gas, child care costs, or how much you’ve spent on groceries this week. You have to admit that you have a love/hate relationship with money. Many times you love and hate money for the same reason: because of the things that it can buy. What’s needed is a heart-centered attitude towards learning about your money story and rewriting the parts that no longer serve you.
𝗠𝗶𝘀𝘀 𝗣𝗮𝗹𝗺𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟴, 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟭. 𝗦𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗗𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗮𝘀, 𝗧𝗲𝘅𝗮𝘀. 𝗦𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗳𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮𝗻 𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘅𝗶𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘄𝗲𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝟭𝟬𝟬 𝗽𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝘀. 𝗦𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗵𝗮𝗶𝗿 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗯𝗲𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗲𝘆𝗲𝘀. 𝗦𝗶𝗱𝗻𝗲𝘆 𝗶𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝘁𝗼 𝘄𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗴𝗹𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗿 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘀.
𝗠𝗶𝘀𝘀 𝗣𝗮𝗹𝗺𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘁𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗼𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗮𝗿𝗺 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱𝗲𝗿; “𝗕𝗲𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗳𝘂𝗹” 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗹𝗲𝗳𝘁 𝘀𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗯𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘀𝘁, 𝗮 𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗯𝗼𝘄 𝗼𝗻 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗺, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝗻 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗻𝗲𝗰𝗸.
𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗼𝗯𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗲𝗱 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗯𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗰.𝗰𝗼𝗺
𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘃𝗶𝘀𝗶𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗻 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗯𝗲𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗯𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲.
Life Coach + Podcast Host
𝙎𝙤𝙥𝙝𝙞𝙖 𝘼𝙣𝙩𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙖𝙘𝙝, 𝙥𝙤𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜𝙜𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛-𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤𝙥𝙞𝙘𝙨. 𝙎𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙯𝙚𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙥𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙜𝙜𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙖𝙨𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨, 𝙖𝙣𝙭𝙞𝙚𝙩𝙮, 𝙞𝙢𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙮𝙣𝙙𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙚, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛-𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙚𝙢 𝙧𝙚𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙙𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙞𝙚𝙨. 𝙎𝙤𝙥𝙝𝙞𝙖 𝙚𝙢𝙥𝙡𝙤𝙮𝙨 𝙘𝙤𝙜𝙣𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙤𝙧𝙖𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙥𝙮 (𝘾𝘽𝙏) 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡 𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙤𝙧𝙖𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙥𝙮 (𝙍𝙀𝘽𝙏) 𝙩𝙚𝙘𝙝𝙣𝙞𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙥 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣 𝙙𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙡𝙤𝙥 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙠𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙜𝙪𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙘 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨 – 𝙙𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙧 𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙢𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙙𝙞𝙘𝙩𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙗𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙚𝙡𝙨𝙚.
𝙁𝙤𝙧 𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙨, 𝙎𝙤𝙥𝙝𝙞𝙖 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙙𝙧𝙖𝙬𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚 𝙘𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙗𝙚 𝙖𝙘𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙘𝙝 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙧 𝙜𝙤𝙖𝙡𝙨. 𝙎𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙩𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙨 𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙖𝙢𝙞𝙡𝙮 𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙙𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙩 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙖𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙥𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙚. 𝙋𝙧𝙞𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙖𝙘𝙝, 𝙎𝙤𝙥𝙝𝙞𝙖 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙧𝙞𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙝𝙪𝙨𝙗𝙖𝙣𝙙. 𝙃𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙙𝙞𝙖𝙜𝙣𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙙 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝘾𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙞𝙘 𝙆𝙞𝙙𝙣𝙚𝙮 𝘿𝙞𝙨𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚, 𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙪𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙛𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙙𝙞𝙖𝙡𝙮𝙨𝙞𝙨, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙬𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙖 𝙨𝙪𝙘𝙘𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙠𝙞𝙙𝙣𝙚𝙮 𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙧𝙮. 𝙏𝙤𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧, 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮’𝙫𝙚 𝙧𝙖𝙞𝙨𝙚𝙙 3 𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙙𝙧𝙚𝙣 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙘𝙪𝙧𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙎𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙬𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙁𝙡𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙙𝙖.